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Showing posts from November, 2016

On My Mind

Addendum  I'm going to publish this mainly because I truly believe in it's content --- even though it's a post from last week.  Things have transpired and I did get some help from some dear friends --- that I cherish.  However, I've had much thought, and I've processed things almost incessantly.  My depression has somewhat subsided, I don't feel like I'm spiraling out of control.  When you feel so alone in the world  - a world that feels cold, detached, and uncaring, it's a devastating feeling.  I know some of you can relate.  Missing loved ones, spending holidays by yourself, and being broke to boot - feels like hitting a bottom where hope is concerned.  I made it through, of course  but not without pain.  I don't like emotional pain.  Who does?  But I had to ask myself many questions, and I did not like some of them.  I did not like it because some of them were in regards to my being angry with myself.  Those kinds of queries are never easy to ad…

Unexpected Answers......

It's been a while since I've written.  I've had several new things develop.  I've began a new therapy, and I'm ever so excited (and hopeful) about it.  I had decided to change therapist's because of a multitude of inappropriate things that were taking place, the main thing was that I was not being heard.  Knowing from my own background -- a good therapist listens, whereas what I was experiencing was being told that what I felt was inaccurate.  That's a huge red flag.  My self-esteem might not be stellar but it isn't the lowest of low.... and I kept having that shoved down my throat.  If I know anything I am a survivor, and a damn good one at that - I may not have the greatest of coping skills, however they've gotten me through many a trauma.  Besides, I got very tired of hearing stories about other clients (no names were used of course) as if these stories were somehow useful to me.  Take it from me, if you feel like you're not being heard by yo…