This is me, today after surgery yesterday morning. Sorry I look so awful - but I did just have a sedptorihineoplasty. My nose had been broken and was crooked, as well as having had a deviated septum. The doctor corrected all of that - including breaking multiple bones, as well as restructuring the tip and the end that was coming out too far or "bulging" as he called it. It is/was a very painful surgery - and I am in a great deal of pain as I write. I was made to stay overnight for pain control due to the insolence of the pain clinic that I have to go to because of the chronic pain that I have. There isn't anywhere else that will treat my pain. The physician that is in charge there, flat out denied an additional pain meds post surgery. Stating that what I currently on was enough. I had a feeling he was going to do this because he has absolutely NO COMPASSION and IS INEPT in his profession. How in the world can broken bone and cutting of flesh be covered by medication that isn't even managing my current level of pain - it has not been altered in over (at least 5 years) and my pain levels now are from 6-8 daily --- supposed to cover this pain? I'm livid to say the least and just blown away. I was frankly so enraged I was shaking.
How does someone deal with a controlling maniac like this? I told my ear, nose, and throat doctor that I'd just break my contract with them. Of course, this leaves me in a lurch. I'll tell you yesterday after surgery, I could have cared less. I'm still in SO MUCH pain. However, you see it is not him that is suffering. He- we'll call him - Dr. O, has no negative affects. He can still carry out his life with no side affects, and obviously has no conception of pain. My doctor that did the surgery called and called him and explained what was done an it was still a definitive "NO".
What do I do now? Obviously I have to deal with the pain. That's a given, I have no choice because Dr. O has convinced my nose dr. that I will go into respiratory arrest if given anything stronger --- because he thinks he's the expert on pain medication. I can tell you after having had three pain pumps and being on high levels of pain medications --- he is completely stupid. Yes, I said he is quite unlearned about increased tolerance --- for I have had pharmacology in college. He has as much as said to me that he will never change my meds. This is insane... I think he got his license off the internet... SERIOUSLY. However there is nothing now that I can do. I am completely powerless.
I ask myself what does this mean? Why is this happening? Does God have anything to do with this or is this just ruthless people? I know that my Lord would not have me suffer like this. I just know that. I just refuse to believe that the God of my belief/understanding would not want me to suffer, that this has everything to do with this doctors ignorance.
So please, I'm asking for prayers. I need them. It seems to me that it's time for a change. Obviously. God will direct me. I do have an option - I think. I will call in the morning - they open @ 6:00 a.m.
I have great faith. I believe that this will turn out as it should, and that God has me, in the palm of His hand. Yes, I'm suffering but no one said this life would be suffering free. People at times are difficult, and we experience storms in our lives. There is a reason that all of this is happening - I just have to stay open and humble until the end, or my answers come. The Lord has an answer. I will always, always have hope.
Thank you, Gina
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